a rocker’s perspective

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Sometimes I feel like cursing my fame.

Sure, I get to travel the world, play the music I want the world to hear with my best mates and do anything my heart desires. It was my goal when I started all this. However, there will always be a time when I just want to quit and take off to parts unknown, be normal after all the things fame had to offer.

Those urges though were never strong at first. Not even when we thought everything was over for us. I know it was there, bidding its time to force me to make that decision. I ignored it most of the time because I knew my goals, as well as my friends’ goals, will be jeopardized by it.

However, that urge became strong… when I met her.

The first time I saw her was at a meet and greet session for a gig we played in another country. To be honest, she stood out too much because she had the same crimson hair I recently sported. She also wore these deadly heels which caused me to flinch as she greeted us. However, by the time she faced me, I knew something had changed. I wanted to speak to her… talk to her for hours… I wanted to stay rooted and just stare at her as she told me everything she wanted.

Unfortunately, before I can ask her name, we had to rush the photos and she walked briskly away to hide her blush. Although I desperately wanted to follow her, I had to control myself because my friend had this odd smile on him as he watched my reaction. Thank Kami I know my friend very much or else I could have clocked him in the face. Work also called so I had to sigh and think ‘I’ll see her in a bit anyway’.

I did see her after a few minutes and obviously, she was no longer wearing the heels because I could clearly see her stand straight. Her eyes glittered as she watched us perform and much to my delight, she called to me. If only I had the chance to record it, damn! I would put it on replay and better yet, make it my alarm clock, text tone and ringing tone. I have got to know her, my heart years for her!

The crimson goddess continued to haunt me after we left the country. From drilling my friend, I found out he knew her and even heard her call out to me. He even shared to me her details with a glint in his eyes. I ignored it and browsed her accounts. Even if I found out her name, to me, she was my crimson goddess. My very own goddess.

I wanted to send her a message… heck, even call her.


Would she believe me and my intent to get to know her?

Looking at her messages to me and the posts she did, I knew if I did send her a message, it will definitely make her happy. I even read her messages several times, including the present she gave to me. I thank our management they allowed our fans to send or give gifts to us. If not, I wouldn’t have seen her handwriting or see the effort she did just for me. Oh sure she gave gifts to my friends, but the one she made for me? it was one of a kind. Her words were like a prayer… a prayer I wanted to grant.

This fueled me further to come back and see her, tell her how I feel.

But, my fame has continued to stop me from this and other things also came in the way. But I am a patient man. I will have my chance to reciprocate every message my crimson goddess wrote for me.

If things go smoothly now that I’m packing my bags for the next episode, the day I come back… is the day I defy the dangers of my fame and the day I tell her I love her too.


Odd post for today isn’t it? This is actually a short story I am writing for a dear friend for a special day. Yes I’m a devious kami for writing this and I know my friend would love it too. Maybe she will even keel over because of it. Hahaha! The possibilities of that are so high. HAHAHA!

But, kidding aside, this one is for her. I wonder how she will react because of this. Hahaha!

I will be updating in a few days. I am just normalizing my schedule to do something. Busy days ahead.


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